timmaysgirl

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2009-09-28T22:54:54Z

hw 216
lw 147
cw 209
gw 135

i'm starting weight watchers tomorrow! i really have no time to work with going to school full time. i'm not sure if i'm gonna go vegan with it or just what... i'll figure it out tho. until i'll just count my points i wanna be 175 by january! i need a ana friend.

its been 2 weeks since i lasted posted

2009-06-14T04:18:26Z

my life sucks! what can i say.. i'm at a low point in my life. This isnt cool. I have to lose 70 pounds! should i do diet pills. i work out about 3 to five days out of the fucking week and NOTHING. my skinny jeans still dont fit i have been working out for seven weeks and i have lost a pound. i'm over it. i should stop listeing to others and start thinking for myself. my goal weight is 135 in order to have a heatlhy BMI right now i weigh umm 205 206 even 212.. so i'm unsure about my weight so i'll weigh myself tomorrow mornng and give you guys a up date. Tim is out of town.. and i'm all by myself! it sucks!

this just cant be

2009-05-24T17:09:15Z

why am i 211 pounds
i'm working out.. and eating

i just want to be wear i was..

here's the deal

2009-05-24T05:33:37Z

we said best friends forever.

if you must know..
she's skinny.
i'm not.
I have stlye..
she didnt until she started buying clothes i'd buy
I have a better personality
she's just quite and doesnt have a opinion, unless its mine
she really trys to be me in everyway
i start wearing my hair really long.
she does too
i start wearing false eyeslashes
she does too
i start tanning she does too
i stop tanning.. she does too
i stop eating meat. guess who does too!

get what i'm saying.. and the list goes on!

ask me why we are friends? well we arent anymore. i'm done with it. i realize ppl change. and i cant stand being friends with someone that soo much like me yet is better than me because she's thinner. I think i hate her. and i want nothing to do with her. she's a shitty person and doesnt care about anyone about herself. i hope the bitch get's fat.

at lest i'm good at what i do. she cant even cut hair and she knows it.

'm just really mad. but i'll get over it. i know i'm a better person and wont let her get me down
i

guess who's back

2009-05-23T05:16:38Z

it's brittney bitch! agh where should i start? i moved back home. one of my best friends died in a car cash. and well i've gained weight. alot of weight! my cw is 208... i know .. i'm really fat now. i cant believe i ever bitched about 175.. i was really sexy.. did need to get in shape.. but.. fuck man. this sucks. So i signed up at the gym with my boyfriend. I join a team weight lost class. Its for 12 weeks and and i'm going on into my thrid week. i guess i'm doing good bc my hw was 215. talk about nothing to wear bc none of my clothes fit. So they have me eating 1700 cals a day.. which sounds like a lot but when i workout.. i could eat... and eat and eat... haha its bc my metabolism is speeding.. which is a good sign! So i'm crossing my fringer and i'm going to try and lose 20 pounds.. after the pograms over with i'm gonna sing up again for it.. its 500 dollars, which my boyfriend is paying for it right now. I'm really trying to get over my ed. noone.. and i mean no one understands it. i binged the over night... frist time in a month.. and i'm really proud of myself that, yes i did over eat but i did do it to the point that i felt sick. i did punk it up.. i just had to i didnt want to gain weight. i'm on a healthy diet and working out. so that happen and i i fasted for a day and a half this month.. but i'm done with it.. i want to get this extra weight off and keep it off. its a new start!

i need someone to talk to so bad

2008-12-21T03:32:02Z

i just wanna die.. i cut myself since i was a teenage.. but i did. WHATS WRONG WITH ME!! i just hate myself. i'll never be good enough.. oh i just want this pain to go away! i wish i was home in st.louis.. i'm so alone i hate cali. i just text tim telling him how i feel.. he tried to call me but i didnt pick up.. i'm just crying so much.. oh god. someone help me!!! some just tell me everything is going to be okay

i hate myself

2008-12-21T02:00:23Z

my life sucks. i work tomorrow at sephora i havent worked in over a month.. i'm nervous!

today i ate shrimp.. i ate alot.. but they are so small.. my stomach still felt empty which was such a wonder feeling

i really haveing a shitty day i locked myself out of my car when i was buying smokes.. i text tim and he didnt even fucking CARE!!!! or at lest he ever text me back.. fuck that.. i'm not texting him or calling him tomorrow
and when i was waitting for triple A i change smoke almost my whole pack and bought a low card monster energy drintk.. :/

god, why cant i be thin.. i'm so fat. i wish i was 120 at thought i was fat but instead i'm175 a size 14 i look like i have a 40 years old body.. my 38dd boobs sag down to my belly botton and i look like i already kid i have pregnat belly with all the stretch marks with out having a kid!!!
i wonder how tim could like me... he says he loves me.... no one could ever love me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm really dizzy

2008-12-20T03:16:07Z

i didnt eat today! yay for me!!! but i still feel awful for yesterday.. all i did was lay in bed.. i took a shower and got the mail.
that was it.. SO i wrote up a games plan.. my goal is to be 170 by the 23rd then i'm going to eat soup until the 13th and aim for 150..
then go shopping for some skinny jeans and get my hair done ( if some how i get money for it) * not likey tho* i dont even have money for rent :[[[[[[ i have this awfull feeling my boyfriend is going to cheat on me... I KNOW HE LOVES ME WITH ALL HIS HEART but.. he's so handsome and any girl in her right mind would be all over him.. and tonight he's going to a party thats just for him.. and i know bitches will be there.. and doesnt help i've been all depressed and he says i'm prefect the way i am.. but i know if i dont get skinny he'll cheat on me with hot skinny girls :[ AT LEST I WOULD CHEAT ON ME. my body is so gross! agh. i havent talked to mybest friend in days.. i really dont want to talk to anymore.. i'm really not nice when my ed starts up... but this time.. i'm gonna follow through!
i've already pick out the outfit i want to by to pick tim up at LAX airport. its so sad to me right now.. and i dont know.. i took some diet pills today... i cant swallow for the life of me anymore.. i dont even drink enough water bc i dont wanna gain any more weight. i hate everyone who is 120 and think they are fat! i would kill to be that. well i am killing myself by not eatting. and i do just want to die.. god their's no winning is there

i am a fuck up

2008-12-19T10:36:18Z

i thought i could make it though my day two. i went and bought three taco's from taco bell i ate two of them and gave the thrid one away for the gas station guy.. i bought new ports i really want to stop smoking before tim comes back.. so i'm gonna finish this back and then be DONE!! well i was really depressed by that time so i went and hang out with my only friends i have from school. and that was i big no no!
well they're were a hoilday party at her apartment so we went their and ate tons of food. wasnt my finest hour.. and one of my friends gave me shit.. she said " i thought you were gonna diet, what happen to that. *laughs*'' that made me feel like shit... FAT SHIT
THEN I ACTUALLY OPEN UP...i told them about my ed. AND THEY DIDNT EVEN CARE they went on and on about what i should do to lose weight.. telling me to eat three small meals a day workout and blah blah blah..
FUCK THEM! trust me you dumb bitches i know all the ways to lose weight.

they dont understand how fucked up i am in my head!! how i cry all the time bc i dont like my body! and both of them are skinny and never been fat!

one of my friends boyfriend... said not eatting works and told me that i have a pretty face and eyes... EVEN tho he was saying i'm fat

SOME PLZ talk to me

NOT EATTING TOMORROW

i'm hungry

2008-12-19T00:47:33Z

my mouth will not stop watering...

should i go back to being vegan?? it was just hard and i'm so poor living by myself i couldnt afford it..
all i wan to do is eat... but.. i want to me thin.. this is so hard.. i think i'm gonna go take a shower.. and refresh then make myself all pretty only to go and workout....

day two

2008-12-18T18:33:58Z

hw:180.4
cw: 176.6

So i'm down three point eight pounds since yesterday... i'm so hungry but i have to fit into a size 11/12 by january 13 when my boyfriend comes back

NOW:
waist 33
lower waist 38
hips 48

so gross
33-38-48

goal: ( size 11/12 urban outfitters
waist 30''
lower waist 32''
hips 40''

need to lose
waist 3''
lower waist 6''
hips 8''

i really need some friends// that understands me..
:[[[ i miss my boyfriend but i'm happy that he's gone bc then i dont have to eat

day one

2008-12-18T08:47:56Z

So i woke up at ten and called into school and told them i couldnt come. the big reason why i skipped class bc we were having a holiday food party. i just dont want to be fat anymore.. that means no eatting

so i went back to bed and didnt get up until four... and then i went over to a friends to wash clothes and workout
WHY IS IT THAT EVERYONE WANTS TO BUY ME FOOD... my friend wanted me to eat taco bell... and i bitch and said no.. no.. NO!
she needed up eatting in front of me .. it sucked! i'm so hungry! no joke. but i cant wait to weigh myself :p

i have to wake up up nine and take my roommate to the airport.. not looking forward to it...
whatever..

I MISS MY BOYFRIEND!!!!!!!!!! i love him so much we are going to spend the rest of our lives together!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm drunk

2008-12-17T06:58:14Z

so taday was the frist day my boyfriends gone :[[ this suck. i miss him.
so i starting drinking bc i'm sad... i hate myself for drinking..
not only am i fat but now i'm a ugly fat drunk. een wrose!
i'm never drinking again! i feel like SHIT blah!
but tomorrow starts the fast and i'm gonna do this!!! i cant wait i know the first four days i'll lose like ten pounds bc i've done it before.. i wish i never stop being vegan that was such a smart way to keep my weight down

i'm thinking about reading skinny bitch again and become vegan once tims back
being vegan is the smartest thing to do!!

yup! just made up my mind...

i'm gonna be a skinny bitch! boo-yah!

HELP! I REALLY NEED SOME FRIENDS RIGHT NOW

2008-12-16T17:05:14Z

so my boyfriend has left town for christmas.. and he wont be back for 28 days .. we been when each other for almost four months and live together.. i used to weigh 150 now i'm at 180.. i'm so depressed about my weight yet i'm totally in love.. and you know ppl say you always gain weight when your relationship.. and i stop all my habits of not eating for days..

so i wanna make me so happy.. i'm gonna go on a 28day water fast.. and lose some of this fat
and go buy a sexy outfit for the day he comes back

someone go on this fast with me!!!